Adding insult to injury, Kendall Carter beats a Pacific player to the ball AND sticks her tongue out at the beaten player. That's cold, Kendall. 

Our new all-star mascot. We have to get a suit that fits David Gregg. 

Le Grand Orange

Dakota Earnhart takes a corner kick at the Carbondale tournament.

The big question, though, is what the heck is going on in the back ground. Did that kid steal the ball from the grown up? Is the grown up trying to steal the ball from the kid?

Champions of the 3rd Grade Division A at Carbondale, Sikeston and Cape Girardeau! Not only did they win, they din't lose a game.

They are: (front)Colten Jerolds, John Haar, Jacob Brush, Garrett Nadeau, Joel Hardin, and Branden Duffield. (Back) Zane DeWitt, Dustin Ryan, Derek Harvel, Aaron Areola, Steven Wells, Jake Hardin, and Noah Fuller. Coaches Bindi Jerolds and Jennifer Nadeau.

They played like they had soup on their heads!!!

Iranian Soccer

I am throwing all my considerable prestige and power behind this recommendation.

Who knew that Iran even HAS a soccer team?

Brennan vs. Festus

Sure Festus can beat us, but I bet Walter Brennan can beat Festus.

Festus!

The 5th and 6th grade boys lost to Festus...how can that be?

Oh wait a second...he's packin' heat.

Cape Girardeau Update

I predicted it, and so it was...the 1st and 2nd grade boys won the championship, 6-2. I also heard that our 5th and 6th grils team finished fourth, losing a playoff game in a shoot out. For those of you wondering, a game ending in a tie goes into a 5 minute overtime; if no one scores, they play another 5 (it's sudden death - or as they call it in soccer, the "golden goal"). If it's still tied, a shootout begins - five players from each team, alternating penalty shots. If it stays even, they do it again with 5 different players. It is excruciating to watch...especially when your kid misses.

Am I sure of the length of the overtime or the number of players involved in the shootout? No. I've never refereed a game that went into overtime. Here's hoping I never will.

Cape Giradeau Results

Another tournament, another successful weekend for the Union County Soccer League!

Let's go to the scoreboard:

First and Second Grade

I have to admit I didn't see the end of the boys' last game, but they were up 4-0 in the championship game versus Jackson County at halftime. I'm going out on a limb here but CONGRATULATIONS for another terrific tournament CHAMPIONSHIP. The boys beat Mineral Area 7-0, Perryville 3-0, and Cape Girardeau 5-1.


The girls' team played shorthanded all tournament and played hard, beating Perryville 7-0 but losing to Jackson County, Sikeston and Cape. FOUR games playing with NO SUBSTITUTES. Way to go girls...now go to bed.


Third and Fourth Grade Boys

The 3rd graders won the championship for the THIRD STRAIGHT tournament beating Carbondale, their arch-rival Sikeston, and Cape Girardeau, ending with a tie against Perryville. Final score: Union County 10-4.

The forth grade boys beat Jackson 6-1 and Sikeston Red 4-0, but lost to the club team from Farmington 0-2. The also were trailing in their last game but I don't know the final results.

Fifth and Sixth Grade

The girls played one of the most exciting games of the tournament, scoring with 2 minutes to play to win 1-0 against somebody called the D.C. Hot Shots. Anybody know where they're from? Anyway, they also beat Jackson and Kennett but lost to Perryville. They were playing one last game for third place; no results at press time.

The boys beat Cape 4-2, but lost to Sikeston and Festus. Festus? Wasn't he a character on Gunsmoke or something? I'll get back to you.

High School

They lost to Perryville 0-1, Cape 1-4, and San Francisco 1-2 but beat Cobden 2-0 so it was all worth while.


Can you tell I learned how to put color in my posts?


If you have any pictures that you would like to post, please send them to me at jope@cba.siu.edu!!! Not hundreds at a time!


By the way, I'll be glad to publish anything you may consider newsworthy (as long as it's soccer related)!

DR. WELLS, CALL YOUR OFFICE!

Katie Edwards. Sammy Schott, and Courtney Kendrick. Put down the cupcake and back away slowly.

Elijah Haar (1st and 2nd Grade All-Stars) appears to have the only long sleeved all-star shirt we have in stock. Either that or he has hoisted his sails... 

Having bagged his first crane with a rifle butt, Robby Kendrick tries a new apporach. 

Sikeston Results

You older soccer moms and dads (and younger soccer grandmothers and grandfathers) may remember the boffo hit by Robert Palmer in 1976, "Women Are Smarter". Apparently not only are they smarter, they can play soccer! OK, they're girls, but if we call them pre-women it makes sense.

All 3 of our girls' teams finished in the money in Sikeston. The 1st and 2nd graders took FIFTH (out of 12 teams), finishing with 2 wins and a loss. The 3rd and 4th graders took the CHAMPIONSHIP, beating undefeated Pacific 7-0. The 5th and 6th graders swept their division and they too won a CHAMPIONSHIP with a 3-0 record.

The boys did pretty well to. The 1st and 2nd graders won the CHAMPIONSHIP with a 3-0 record; Jennifer Nadeau's 3rd grade machine took a home a CHAMPIONSHIP (their second in a row, and in the A bracket!) with a 3-0-1 record. In the final, they had to score at least 3 goals (I think) and hold the other team to less than 2. They won 7-0!

The 4th grade boys took THIRD with a record of 2-1; the 5th and 6th grade boys finished 1-2, as did the Junior High Co-ed squad. I did not get any High School results.

So we had an overall record of 19-6-1 with FOUR # 1 teams (out of 8 ). This has been a wildly successful tournament season and I want to thank once again the coaches and parents for their support, and congratulations to all our players who have played hard AND fair.

See you in Cape Girardeau!

Top 10 Things Parents Don't Get...

about kids and sports. Attention! Soccer parents!

Thanks for the tip, Jennifer!

The undefeated 1st and 2nd grade boys, in no particular order:

Dakota Earnhart, Hunter Garver, Elijah Haar, J.T. Moore, Zack Paar, Isaac Pender, Colin Prather, Wyatt Smith, Ryan Stark, Orlando Arreola, and Dale Prater.

Winning the War, One Soccer Ball at a TIme

From the National Review.....

Things got so boring for the 1st and 2nd grade boys, they started shooting at their own goalie. That's Isaac Pender in the goal. Any body know who #39 is in the retro shirt? 

Carbondale Tournament Photos

The official photographer of the Carbondale Tournament, Time Piece Photography, has posted a bunch of photos at their website. Buy a bunch so they can afford to buy a zoom lens.

The socks look like Dusty Whiteside's, but the rest of the uniform I can't place. Saline County maybe? 

A Comparison

For comparison purposes, I checked how we did in last spring's Marion Tournament. UCSL went 20-18-3 with 10 teams, as opposed to our record at Carbondale of 24-5-5.

Carbondale Final Results

Here are the results from the Carbondale Tournament. Overall, our 8 teams compiled a record of 24 wins, 5 losses, and 5 ties. Unbelievable! Thanks to all the coaches and parents who made it happen...

First and Second Grade:

There are no championships awarded in this category when the tournament takes place in Illinois. The boys' team (playing in the A bracket) went undefeated with a 4-0 mark. The girls' team won 3 games and lost only 1, and played well enough that the Sikeston Tournament director asked them to move up from the B to the A bracket.

Third Grade Boys:

Won the championship. Not only did they win it all, they played 5 games AND DID NOT ALLOW A GOAL. Eight of their players scored goals; they scored a total of 21! If there was an A+ bracket, they'd be in it.

Fourth Grade Boys:

Won 4 games before losing to Cape Girardeau in the Finals.

Third and Fourth Grade Girls:

Won 4 games, and took third place. They, too, were asked to move up to the A bracket in Sikeston.

Fifth and Sixth Grade Boys:

Went 1-1-1 and finished second.

Fifth and Sixth Grade Girls:

Went undefeated, winnning one and tieing three. They finished third in the division.

Junior High Co-ed:

Lost in OVERTIME to Cobden in the finals.

So there you have it. Six teams (not including the 1st and 2nd graders) and a first place finish, three seconds, and two third place finishes. Did I mention...UNBELIEVABLE.

Dan Pineau steals the ball from a Saline County player....

She doesn't appreciate it. 

We need more women referees

Women know more than men, at least when it comes to soccer.

Carbondale Results, Saturday October 29

Did you ever have someone come to your party who eats all your chips, drinks all your beer, and leaves? And you find out later he took all your silverware?

That's kinda what Union County Soccer did in the first day of the Carbondale Fall Tournament. To the best of my knowledge, we WON 16 GAMES, lost ONE, and tied THREE.

Special congratulations to our "A" teams, the 1st and 2nd grade co-ed team and the 3rd grade co-ed team. The 1st and 2nd grade boys (translate "co-ed") beat Sikeston 5-4, Jackson County 5-1, and Cape Girardeau 5-1. The older fellas beat Perryville 4-0, Cape Crush 5-0, and Sikeston 6-0. Not only that, EIGHT different 3rd grade players scored goals.

The 1st and 2nd grade girls beat Sikeston 6-5 and Perryville 5-0. The 3rd and 4th girls won 6-0 over Sikeston, 6-1 vs. Saline County, and 4-1 over Carbondale. The 4th grade boys beat Marion 3-0 amd Sileston 2-1. The 5th and 6th grade boys lost to Perryville 0-3, but came back for a tie in their next game. The girls tied Marion at 1, and routed Saline County 11-1.

The 7th and 8th co-ed team deserves special notice, since they are a true co-ed team playing against all-boy teams. They beat Perryville (I think) 2-0 and tied Marion 1-1.

This is as accurate as I could get from walking around and asking and occasionally checking the scoreboard. I'll verify and repost tomorrow, with the final results.

Real Jihadists Don't Play Soccer

It turns out that soccer (football) may not be all bad. I hope this doesn't affect our rosters too much. From the Pakistan Daily Times Monitor:

Saudi clerics declare football un-Islamic

Daily Times Monitor

LAHORE: Ulema in Saudia Arabia have issued a fatwa (religious decree) declaring football an un-Islamic sport, and have urged the youth to quit it immediately, BBC radio reported on Saturday.

According to the report, the clerics urged the youth to indulge in jihad and other constructive activities that could help the Muslim ummah, the radio reported. The ulema argued that football wastes a lot of time and the participants wear shorts, which they said was an un-Islamic dress, the radio reported.

Following the decree, some players of the famous Taif Football Club have quit the game, the report added.

Can't argue with that, can ya?

I WAS WRONG

For years, I have been arguing soccer is a socialist sport. I was wrong. It turns out that it's a COMMUNIST sport. From www.opinionjournal.com:

Our item yesterday on metric football prompted this reply from reader Eddie Staples:

While I certainly sympathize with your attitude toward this "sport" implicit in the name you give it, I think the appropriate disdain can only be shown by calling it what it really is: communist football. Consider:

• No one understands the rules.
  
  
• Workers are prohibited from using the tools that would let them be more productive (hands).
  
  
• From time to time petty bureaucrats (officials) interfere with play in such a way as to limit production.
  
  
• Players, coaches, officials and fans are all fully involved (employed) and yet output is miniscule.
  
  
• Any production is met by celebration all out of proportion to its objective value.
  
  
• Followers are slavishly (religiously?) devoted to the system and their own brand of it and resort to violence at any criticism of either.

Good points all, but "communist" and "metric" turn out to be inextricably linked. The Soviet Union used the metric system, and Cuba, North Korea, Red China and Vietnam still do.

I HOPE WE PLAY THESE GUYS IN SIKESTON

We need a first round match-up.

Fall Schedules

The pre-k/k schedule and the 1st and 2nd schedule are linked on the right. The 3rd and 4th schedule will be posted tomorrow.

Stan Fuller did not have as much luck as last year selecting his Harvel team..... 

Registration update

As of today (July 27) we have a total of 223 players registered for the Fall 2005 season. Registration forms continue to trickle in and as of now we will continue to accept them.

We are lacking coaches. In particular we need four Pre-K/K coaches , possible one more 1st /2nd coach, two more 3rd/4th, and two Junior high coaches. We will decide tonight whether to create an all-girl 6-7-8 grade team.

If you would like to help us by coaching a team, let me know - my phone number is 833-4160.

Time for a fund raiser....

We need one of these for the top of the concession stand to protect the kids from evil pixie...sticks.

Lousy field, but pretty spacious concession stand, don't you think? 

It takes speed and agility to play soccer. Yeah....right.

FALL 2005 SEASON INFO

I know, I know, summer hasn't even started yet, but here's the schedule of upcoming events:

July 1 - registration forms mailed.

July 23 - Registration deadline; registration at Anna Junior High (?)

August 1 - Coaches meeting; drawing of teams; election of executive board

First game - September 6

More information to follow...please spread the word!

INCOMING!

Who is a better soccer player? The kid who grew up playing the game...or the guy with the gun?

New Yorkers are Smarter Than the Rest of the World

Mike Vaccaro, Sportswriter, New York Post:

" But I am also certain that, relatively speaking, we are as sane, as sensible, as reasonable, and as rational, as any sports fan in the world. And that is because, as a people, we in New York look at a soccer ball and see a sleeping pill. We see a soccer game invade our television screen and will pull a hamstring lunging for the remote to change the channel. "

SOMEONE disagrees with Mike Vaccaro. 

If looks could kill, SOMEBODY would be dead.

I asked Samantha what the difference was playing versus boys (compared to the all-girl all star games). She thought about it....looked at the field for a while....and said, "They're shorter."

CHAMPIONS

Congratualtions to the 1st and 2nd grade co-ed all-stars for taking FIRST PLACE in the Cape Girardeau Tournament. They beat the home team 1-0 in the last game. The goal was scored by Garrett Nadeau. Jacob Brush was awarded the Spirit Award by coach Jennifer Nadeau for soccer above and beyond the call of duty.

If you have a picture of the team, send it to me at jope@cba.siu.edu!

Cape results so far

This is Edward Morrow reporting from a rooftop in Cape:

High School :
2-3 vs Perryville
1-1 vs Cape Girardeau

5th and 6th Co-ed:
1-1 vs Cape Stars (goal - Christopher Windings)
1-6 vs Perryville Storm (goal - Cody Garver)

1st and 2nd Girls:
0-2 vs Cape Stars
1-1 vs Perryville Hot Shots (goal-Natilyn Hepburn)

1st and 2nd Boys:
5-1 vs Jackson Red (goals - Zach Zach Zach Paar, Noah Noah Fuller)
1-1 vs Perryville Thunder

Today's Quiz

Can you find the athlete who has not been accused of taking steroids? Is it Barry Bonds?

Is it Jason Giambi?

Or is it Hayden Newberry? 

Steven Wells..often imitated....