This is lame...

DEALING BY WHEELING: Three Argentinean fans were thrown out of their home nation's World Cup match against Holland after it was discovered that they masqueraded as disabled in order to buy discount tickets. The three rolled wheelchairs to their fraudulent seats, Ananova.com reported on June 27. But their ruse was discovered when one got so excited by the game that he leapt out of his seat. His buddy explained: "Our friend couldn't stop jumping and a person near us thought there was a miracle happening."

Third-World Cup results

Somalia Defeats Rwanda To Win Third-World Cup

June 29, 2006 | Onion Sports

KHARTOUM, SUDAN—The host city of the 2006 Developing Nations Football Championship erupted in cheers that nearly drowned out the cries of the starving and wounded Tuesday when the underdog Somali side, playing four down due to injuries and landmines, outlasted the more experienced if disease-ridden Rwandans 1-0 to win the inaugural Third-World Cup.

Quarter-Final Round

England plays Portugal, France plays Brazil, Germany plays Argentina, and Italy plays Ukraine.

Wouldn't it be cool if the final four were Germany, Italy, France, and England? It would be like World War II without all the guns and stuff. Italy is particularly suited for the role seeing as how their players dive for cover whenever a shadow passes near them.

Italy Sucks

In the final seconds of the Italy - Australia game, Italy's Fabio Grosso had the ball in the goalie box. The Australian defender tried to slide tackle the ball away but missed. Grosso had a choice - step over the defender and take a shot, or flop and try to get a penalty kick. Being on the Italian team he naturally took the flop option and got a penalty kick. Francesco Totti scored; game over, 1-0. After scoring Totti ran around SUCKING HIS THUMB! Classy. 

About the Portugal-Netherlands game...

What a disgusting display. Portugal managed to prove themselves to be the dirtiest team in the Cup, while also managing to take the title for biggest babies of the tournament. Holland wasn't much better.

And in defense of Referee Valentin Ivanov... in my opinion, the teams DESERVED the 16 yellow cards laid on them. Despite knowing that he was going to be slapping cards, neither team could control themselves. Portugal now faces England without Deco and Costinha Good. I hope they lose.

Sunday's Games

Sven Eriksson (England's coach) dissed me. No sooner did I write an entry questioning the single striker strategy he CHANGED to it. And got lucky, thanks to Beckham's goal.

Holland's coach, Marco Van Basten, also dissed me. He BENCHED HIS BEST SCORER, Ruud Van Nistelrooij. Not only benched him, but DIDN'T even PLAY HIM. And lost 0-1.

BRILLIANT!

That's what Maxi Rodriguez's goal to beat Mexico was...brilliant. 

200TH POST

The 200th post to this blog was a photo of a guy in a kangaroo suit. What does it mean?

AUSTRALIA IN THE FINALS FOR THE FIRST TIME IN 32 YEARS!

How can you NOT cheer for a them? 

I Don't Know Much About Soccer, But...

Teams playing in the World Cup fell in to two basic categories, those that use a single striker and those that use two. It occured to me (and I could be wrong) that those who used two strikers in the first round scored more goals than those that didn't. Argentina, Spain and Germany scored 8 goals each, Brazil 7 goals. They use two strikers. Portugal(5), Holland (3), U.S.A. (2) and France (only 1 goal when using a single striker) attack with one.

Call me crazy, but it seems to me that if you want to score you want to use two strikers. I'm no Bruce Arena but I WAS born in Brooklyn...

Soccer as Metaphor

Mostly soccer is just guys in shorts running around aimlessly, a metaphor for the meaninglessness of life.

Last Day of the First Round

After today, we'll know who will fill the last spots in the Round of 16. There are eight teams playing; only Togo has been eliminated. Spain is just about a lock.

Don't forget, you can go to the FIFA World Cup web site for a schedule of the next round's games!

Why Americans Don't Care

From the Weekly Standard's Jonathan V. Last:

But there is one obstacle to soccer acceptance that seems insurmountable: the flop-'n'-bawl.

Turn on a World Cup game, and within 15 minutes you'll see a grown man fall to the ground, clutch his leg and writhe in agony after being tapped on the shoulder by an opposing player. Soccer players do this routinely in an attempt to get the referees to call foul. If the ref doesn't immediately bite, the player gets up and moves along.

Making a show of your physical vulnerability runs counter to every impulse in American sports. And pretending to be hurt simply compounds the outrage. Basketball has floppers, but the players who do it--like Bill Laimbeer, whose flopping skills helped the Detroit Pistons win two NBA championships--are widely vilified and, in any case, they're pretending to be fouled; they never pretend to be injured.

The U.S. team has gone the way of the pig-footed bandicoot. 

Groups C and D

Play is complete. Moving on are Argentina, who will play Mexico in the next round and Netherlands (RUUD!), who will play Portugal.

Wayne Rooney

This is a Nike ad starring England's Wayne Rooney. What do you see? To me, it's a shirtless footballer who is excited and painted with the national symbol of St. George's cross. Creepy? Yes. Make me want to buy Nike? No.

What do other's see? From The Daily Mail:
Labour MP Stephen Pound said the advert was 'truly horrible.'

'This is such a horrible image and is so horribly war-like that it can only be described as Nike being crass, offensive and insensitive as they try to hitch poor old Rooney to their commercial band-wagon.'

Rev Rod Thomas of Church of England evangelical group Reform says, 'It therefore brings to mind the crucifixion to many people, and why Nike would want to do that, I haven't a clue, unless it is simply as a publicity stunt.

'The trivialisation of Christ's suffering is highly offensive to Christians and to God. This will cause real hurt to people."

Geez...lighten up, guys. 

Bart should play for Portugal, THE GREATEST NATION ON EARTH! 

The Greatest Nation on Earth is...PORTUGAL!

Portugal beat Mexico 2-1 today in World Cup action.


This is from a Simpson's episode:

TV Announcer: The Continental Soccer Association is coming to Springfield!
It's all here--fast-kicking, low scoring, and ties? You bet!
Bart: Hey, Dad, how come you've never taken us to see a soccer game?
Homer: I...don't know.
TV Announcer: You'll see all your favorite soccer stars. Like Ariaga!
Ariaga II! Bariaga! Aruglia! And Pizzoza!
Homer: Oh, I never heard of those people.
TV Announcer: And they'll all be signing autographs!
Homer: Woo-hoo!
TV Announcer: This match will determine once and for all which nation is the
greatest on earth: Mexico or Portugal!

-- Watching television, "The Cartridge Family"

They Need A Magic Stretcher!

I don't know what to make of this story.

If these guys are so serious about soccer, how come China is ranked 68th by FIFA?

Tuesday's Games

Group A and B finished up yesterday. Germany advances to play Sweden; England will play Paraguay. Groups C and D finish today with two good ones - Ruud's team plays Argentina and Mexico against Portugal.